But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize
