One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
