we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize