Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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