so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
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