Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize