are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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