some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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