i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
