Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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