Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
