just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Randomize