I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
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