Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize