Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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