You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Randomize
