Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize
