Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
