Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
