we made out on top of his cat.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
