laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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