i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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