dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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