I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I am mentally ready for anal.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize