I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Randomize
