he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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