I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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