They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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