I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
