I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
