There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
