it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
