I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
