i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Randomize