the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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