i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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