we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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