I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
I deserve this hangover.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
