oh god the rape fog is back!
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
Randomize
