It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize
