i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
