thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
The ass gains better be worth it
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