Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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