What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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