OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize
