guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
