walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I lost the right to judge tonight
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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