i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
