drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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