so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
