Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
You have to summon your inner elephant
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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